The Haunted Humidor: Cigars That Smoke Themselves!

Hidden away in the misty hamlet of Palookaville, an unassuming tobacco shop holds a captivating secret that sets it apart from your typical, everyday cigar stores. On misty days when mystery and magic seem to fill the air, the world gets to witness its enigmatic phenomenon – a haunted humidor and cigars that puff smoking rings of fire, right in their pristine case, with not a human hand coming close!

Now, before you start shaking your heads and mumbling, let’s assure you that this spectacle isn’t just the creation of an over-enthusiastic rumor mill, but a much-repeated and marvelled-over spectacle. From the first-time visitors to die-hard aficionados, everyone who steps foot inside this bizarre yet fascinating cigar haven has a riveting tale to share.

You see, the story goes deeper than just these supernatural smokes. The cigar store, that holds the spotlight for its titillating tale, is owned by an old sea-captain turned tobacconist, Archibald ‘Ahab’ MacDougal. Ahab’s not your regular octogenarian though. He claims to have sailed all seven seas, engaged in thrilling encounters with mermaids, wrestled with krakens, and even played poker with Neptune himself.

“I’ve seen things that would give ye goosebumps the size o’ ripe gooseberries,” Ahab declares frequently, complete with a knowing twinkle in his weathered eyes and a puff on his perpetual cigar. One of his favourite tales to tell is about his haunted humidor. He swears the humidor was a mermaid’s gift for saving her from a deadly shark, years ago during his gallivanting sea days.

Much like their intriguing owner, these cigars refuse to be just another roll of tobacco leaf. The cigars, according to Ahab, are imbued with a maritime magic that’s both bewitching and bizarre. When placed in the enchanted humidor, they alight by themselves and as though mimicking their old sailor-caretaker, puff out rings of ghostly smoke, filling the room with an aroma of tobacco and the ocean’s brine.

Intriguingly, each self-smoking stogie seems to embody different personalities. The ‘maduro’ likes to startle people by confounding the senses with wild vigor, bursting into flame whilst discharging whirls of thick, rich smoke. On the other hand, the suave ‘connecticut’ prefers more of a slow burn, emitting subtle rings at an unhurried pace, as though never in a hurry to reach its tip.

Taking a fancy to the elusive ‘cubano’, famous stage magician, Dynamo Derek decided to perform an impromptu exorcism using his renowned escapology techniques. The outcome? A befuddled Derek encased in a cloud of cigar smoke, while the proud ‘Cubano’ continued puffing unabated to the hearty laughter of amused onlookers.

But smoking phantasmal cigars is not the only thing that Ahab’s humidor does. Patrons swear have witnessed the lid open and close by itself and have even heard soft, otherworldly whispers in the dead of the night. To add to the allure, every attempt at capturing the bizarre phenomenon on camera has resulted in only blurred images and static-filled videos, further deepening the enigma.

Ahab says his haunted humidor is a meeting spot for ghostly pirates who wish to relax with a well-rolled stogie after a tough day’s haunting. “Ye see, Good tobacco’s a rare find in the afterlife” he insists, as though explaining why the grass is green. Patrons usually take the evidence of their smoked eyes, adding their colorful accounts of witnessing the ghostly puffs adorning the Palookaville air.

For those shaken by logic and scepticism, you may question why sane and sober adults would indulge in such tall tales of ghostly cigars and magical humidors? But to dismiss them just so would rob you the joy of the mysterious, the unexplained, and the charm of Palookaville’s one-of-a-kind tobacco haunt. After all, in a world where reality often leaves little to the imagination, isn’t it relieving to light up a little wonder once in a while? And where better to do that than in a place where cigars exude puffs of smoke on their own, personifying a sailor’s tale of ghosts, mermaids and the mystical sea? So what are you waiting for? Next time misty magic descends over Palookaville, visit Ahab’s shop and witness the spectacle of the Haunted Humidor!