Dragon Opens Barbecue Restaurant: Fire-Grilled Specialties a Hot Hit!

Prepare your taste buds, good people, for a gastronomic journey of fire and flavor. Nestled in a quiet corner of our magnificent city, a new restaurant is sizzling its way into barbecue lore, and you might be shocked, nay, scorched, to meet the master griller: a bona fide, tail-wagging, scale-glowing dragon!

You heard that right, folks. This ain’t some hocus pocus or smoke and mirrors trick; it’s bona fide flame-grilling like you’ve never seen! This dragon, who has coyly divulged his name as Sir Sizzle, has swapped guarding jewels for smoking juicy cuts of meat.

According to the fire-breathing culinary maestro himself, “Humans just didn’t get it,” he sighs, smoke tendrils escaping his nostrils. “Your little grills and your propane tanks, your charcoal briquettes… they just don’t have the touch of a genuine dragon flame.”

What’s a rib-eye steak without a lashing of dragon fire, or pulled pork without a scorching breath? Bland, claims Sir Sizzle, bland and utterly unremarkable. His somewhat unorthodox cooking method leaves the fellow restaurateurs in a fume of jealousy, the competition as smoked out as his hickory-flavored ribs.

He has boldly proclaimed, “The flame from my mouth is as precise as your sous vide machines and as potent as your wood-fired ovens. Except, I bring my own natural smoky seasoning!”

Word on the street has it that the local firefighters, initially on high alert, have now subsided into being regular diners, apparently no longer concerned about the fire hazard once they sampled the fire-grilled delicacies. The chief reportedly prefers his wings extra crispy, his moustache blackened at the edges from the heat.

Now, what does a dragon know about food, you ask? Like any self-respecting creature with a millennia-long lifespan, Sir Sizzle carries culinary wisdom from the ages. He learned meat grilling techniques from the cavemen, spice blending secrets from the nineteen-century mariners, and even nabbed the odd salsa recipe from Aztec warriors. All this historical knowledge wrapped up with a fiery finish guarantees a tantalizing treat for your palate.

The menu is what you’d expect from a barbecue restaurant, if you sidestep the draconian twist. Smokin’ dragon wings, flame-licked brisket, ember-roasted veggies – it’s all there, just with an ol’ fire-breathing spin. Be warned, though – don’t expect any jalapenos. “Too tame”, scoffs Sir Sizzle.

But here’s the rub (BBQ pun intended): does charging up fares with dragon fire break any health code violations? The local health department is in a pickle, apparently. How do you regulate a reptilian Escoffier with a penchant for searing meats his way? No decision, it seems, has been made yet.

And what about the vegetarians, the vegans, and the gluten-intolerant? “Oh, I’ve got a spit-roasted portobello mushroom for you, seasoned with a special blend of herbs,” says Sir Sizzle. “You ain’t tasted mushrooms until you’ve had them roasted Dragon-style.” As for gluten, Sir Sizzle roars, “You want gluten-free? I’ll give you gluten-free, I ain’t a monster. Got some sensational dragon-toasted corn on the cob.”

So, folks, step right up, step right up! This Puff-the-magic-pitmaster is raring and ready to take your orders. Forget your charcoal grills and hog roasts; there’s a new flame in town that guarantees no belly rumbles, but expect a rumble from the proprietor. If you can handle the fire, the smoky alchemy of Dragon’s BBQ will be a palate-pleasing experience you won’t forget. Make sure to give a round of applause for Sir Sizzle – but watch your eyebrows, it might get a bit toasty!